By Carey Nieuwhof

One reason people stay away from Christianity is not because they don’t know any Christians.

It’s often because they do.

Our actions and our terms as partisans of Jesus have the power to lure or repel parties from Christianity.

The number of people who never go to church or follow Jesus obstructs changing. And their gues maintenances changing too( I’ve outlined 15 characteristics of unchurched people here ).

So what can we do about it?

Well, in addition to providing modeling modesty, prayer, truth, cherish and so many other things that describe a very early Christ-followers, we Christians can watch our words.

This post was initially inspired by a piece by Scott Dannemiller wrote, in which Dannemiller insisted Christians to stop saying “feeling blessed” whenever something good came their route. He makes a thoughtful, insightful argument around that.

In that vein, here are three other things Christians has truly stop saying .

1. Prayer Works

Should we are genuinely stop saying that prayer wreaks?

Well, yes and no.

Most people who say devotion drives these days really mean God did what I missed him to do . As if devotion was a button to be pushed to exhaust exactly what they wanted to work with the vending machine.

Prayer is not a button to be pushed; it’s a relationship to be pursued.

Prayer does’ job, ’ but it wields very differently than we’d like. It still’ works’ 😛 TAGEND

When we can’t discover out any direct result from our prayer.

When the opposite of which is something we prayed for happens.

In those times when we feel very distant from God.

When we bang down the door of heaven for years and are not sure anything is going on up there at all.

There are scores of parties within and outside the church whose hearts are suppressed since they are prayed( fervently) and 😛 TAGEND

They didn’t get the job.

Their mom expired of cancer.

Their child was born without a heartbeat.

They ended up in a gondola crash that left them permanently disabled.

Prayer doesn’t’ work’ because I got what I wanted and they didn’t.

The parade of saints in the different regions of the centuries would have been shocked to look devotion reduced to God-doing-what-I-asked-him-to-do-when-I-asked-him-to-do-it. God is not a puppy to be trained or a chef in the kitchen who devises food to suit our every impulse. He is sovereign.

As Richard Foster says 😛 TAGEND

For those adventurers in the frontiers of faith, devotion was no little wont tacked on to the periphery of their lives; it was their own lives. It was the most serious work of their most productive times. Prayer — nothing attracts us closer to the heart of God.

Do events happen supernaturally where reference is pray? Well, yes they do. But often in ways we cannot understand or even retrace out.

I suppose Christians can take succour in the fact that when we pray, we often don’t know what to pray for or even how to pray, hitherto the scriptures tell us the Holy Spirit will carry the devotion into something better than we are capable of motto in the moment.

So pour your soul out to God. Pray about the things the scripture says are close to God’s heart. And when something’ proceeds your path, ’ be grateful and give it back to the God who gave it to you.

And when circumstances don’t travel your practice, understand that God is still very much in control and very much loves you. Just because God is silent doesn’t signify God is absent.

2. God Told Me To …

Often, you hear beings( and clergymen) say stuffs that start with, “God told me to…”

The longer I follow Jesus, the more reluctant I am to say God told me to do anything specific. Maybe that’s an issue I need to work on, but it springs from my observation that I’ve seen this misappropriation far more than I’ve realized it use well or authentically.

In fact, I’ve often noticed that the more outrageous the claim, the more likely someone is to say, “God told me to…”

When I discover someone claim God told them to do something, I feel like saying 😛 TAGEND God told you to do that? Actually? God himself spoke immediately to you and told you to specifically construct that structure for which you have zero money? Or leave that faith that you were in deep come into conflict with without resolving thoughts? Or buy that mansion that’s way out of your rate array? Wow ! Are you sure it wasn’t the pizza? Or the expres in your brain that often tells you to do the things you simply feel like doing ? For the record, I believe there are times when God does speak to parties today. But let’s be realistic. What obligated me set this term on the inventory is the number of durations I have heard the motto used to describe a decision that is 😛 TAGEND

Selfishly motivated( go up, declare it…you’re apologizing your inclinations ).

Contrary to scripture( the scriptures pretty clearly be stated that what you’re doing is sinful…or at the least isn’t prudent ).

Designed to shut down debate( does anyone actually think they can win a “God told me” debate ?).

I’m not saying God never tells us anything directly, but I am suggesting it happens far lower than most of us claim.

So what’s a better trend?

Say something like, “Based on what I know from scripture, I believe this is the best/ boldest/ wisest course of action.”

That reaches feel. And you are able to have an smart discussion.

And you don’t draw the God card to justify something about which Christians and others can have a legitimate discussion.

Or, if you’re just trying to shut down debate, precisely be honest. I wanted to do it, so I did it. There. Now you said it and everyone will feel better.

If you’re dead honest, you might even realize you made a crazy decision.

3. I Could Truly Feel God’s Presence

You’ve discovered this before. We live in an emotional age and we’ve arrived at a lieu where many of us feel like we’ve grow mini-authorities on when God is present and when God is not.

But investigate that.

The truth is, we tend to feel God’s presence more 😛 TAGEND

When the band played our favorite song.

When the band played five of our favorite songs in a row.

When the area was packed.

When the decision ran our way.

When we felt glad during our quiet time.

Is God merely present when we feel him?

Or better yet, is God’s presence synonymous with our capacity to spot it?

Well, of course not.

So why do we insist on speaking like it is?

Nowhere did God promise that the Holy Spirit is a feeling or an emotion.

Jesus did explain to us that the Spirit is a Person and moves freely. The Holy Spirit is bigger than our passions and not subject to our editorial commentary about whether he is present or not.

I have had times when I imagine I felt the presence of God palpably.

But God is at least as present 😛 TAGEND

On our worst daytimes as he is on our best days.

When we are awkward as whenever it is comfortable.

When we are hurting as when we are healing.

And sometimes…the room was just full, and the band was just really good.

We need to learn to trust in God’s presence especially in those instants we suppose he’s absent.

What If ?

What if Christians started having more intelligent, less consumer-oriented, deeper conversations with parties?

What if our relationship with Christ was floored more deeply in God’s character and less in the incessantly changing environments we see around us?

I’m envisaging the dialogue within and outside the church would be so much healthier for it.

What do you think?

Any other things Christians should stop saying now? Scroll down and leave a comment!

About the Author : Carey Nieuwhof is the founding rector of Connexus Church and the author of several journals, including his latest best-selling production,’ Persistent Affect: 7 Potent Discussions That Will Help Your Church Grow.’ Carey speaks to religion leaders around the world about leadership and personal raise. Assure more from him at http :// careynieuwhof.com .

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